Hey Bobbi what is the French for "Handball"

After a night as exciting as last night I thought I'd fall straight asleep, of course I didn't. It had nothing to do with thinking about Slovenia's win against Russia, Portugal's inevitable victory over Bosnia, nor Greece making it to the World Cup for the first time in a while, nor Algeria's historic play-off win over Egypt, I wasn't even thinking about Uruguay being the last team to qualify for said tournament. Now you're all expecting me to claim my sleep deprivation had something to do with France's draw, and subsequent win over two legs, against Ireland, well it didn't, I just don't sleep too well generally.

There is though some people I could well imagine having varying sleep patterns last night who could blame the game. I say the game, one incident that changed everything. If the match last night had finished France 1-1 Republic of Ireland there's a good chance that I wouldn't have anything particular to write about, I would be writing about all the teams who qualified, not just last night but all the teams going to South Africa. Instead it finished Platini 1-1 Republic of Ireland, oh how I hope that French bastard is happy (excuse the French).

So here's my run down of how some of the main player's in last night's play would have slept;

Richard Dunne; A wall at the back for the Irish last night. That was until his foundations were rumbled and down came the wall. As the final whistle blew Dunne, a man in supreme form at the moment who would have been instrumental in the World Cup, sat on the edge of the box. He looked desolate, like a broken man, how he didn't cry was beyond me. When they eventually got back to the team hotel I imagine Dunne, talking to barely any one, pacing around asking himself the usual questions "why!", "what if", "what now". Maybe the Villa man got an hour or two sleep at the end of the night, when every question had been asked, but unanswered. Unfortunately for Dunne they will remain unanswered, he has to go back to his club side and concentrate on the Premier league, as hard as it may be. Next time the World Cup roles around, in 2014, Dunne will be nearly 35, so for him last night may have been it.

Giovanni Trapattoni; A legend in Italian, world and now Irish football. Watching the 70 year old in today's press conference one thing is for sure- he's pissed off. All the questions that Dunne may have asked himself last night Trapattoni has asked them all and more to himself, to the FAI, to Liam Brady, to the press. The Italian doesn't take the view of many, most of us would blame the player involved in the incident, the Italian blames the officials. But perhaps more importantly he has questioned FIFA, and he is right to. He has questioned the choice of officials but more importantly the ranking system suddenly imposed by FIFA for the play-offs, and why his team were the only non-ranked side to play away in the 2nd leg. My assumption on Ireland's manager is that he did sleep, not too well though, he was probably constantly woken up by his own thoughts, all those questions would have not set well on his mind. At 70 the ex-Juventus man would be forgiven for thinking about retirement, I hope he stays on and leads the Irish to the Euros in 2012, and if the universe likes maybe they could knock out France somewhere along the line.

Thierry Henry; This is a tricky one. Henry is an awesome footballer. He is one of, if not the best player I have ever seen. I have never seen Pele or Maradona, often mentioned as the two greatest players, play football and so I cannot wade in on the argument, but certainly in terms of the last decade he is the player of our time! The Frenchman made a name for himself playing for Arsenal, a team, perhaps unfairly, known for cheating. And yet you could never really tar Thierry with the cheating brush, Henry was too busy cutting in from the left, destroying a defender or two on the way, and curling the ball majestically past the keeper and into the top corner of the goal. Last night however I feel Henry has damaged his reputation forever. As the ball came over he could have made a choice, attempt to keep the ball on legally, difficult but legal, or knowingly handle the ball to keep it on the pitch. He did the latter, he cheated, it's that simple. Henry will now be synonymous with that handball, no matter your opinion on him, it has happened before with other world class players. Diego Maradona may be the world's best player ever and yet most can't think about him without discussing his handball moment, 'Hand of God part one' if you will. And another Frenchman, another who could argue to be one of the best players ever, Zinedine Zidane can not now be thought of without the headbutt which ended his career. Back to the point though, sat next to Dunne in the penalty area after the match was Henry. He sat, pensive looking, and consoled Dunne. Later on he laughed off suggestions he should have told the ref he handled the ball, for me it was an act. Henry is generally a fair man, one who slept last night, but the voices in his head probably kept waking him up.

Our final players can be mentioned together, neither would of had problems sleeping, they would not have needed sleep tablets, hot milk or a bedtime story. Quite frankly these two may as well have slept together last night, snuggling up to each other in the warmth of their own disgusting bodies, safe in the knowledge that, apart from Russia, it was job done. The two morons are of course Michel Platini and Sepp Blatter. Moron A, that's how I'll refer to Platini from now on, is the Frenchman in charge of UEFA. It is him who does not want video refs. I admit that the ref may not have asked for video evidence but with all those Irish complaints I can't help but feel he would have done. Of course Moron A would argue that his idea to have extra linesman behind the goal would have worked last night, unless of course the linesman was tying his shoelaces at the time. But it is Moron A's absolute refusal to have video software help out referees which has caused us to look elsewhere, test out his extra linesman and thus slow the process of getting more correct decisions. Moron B, for Blatter, is the head of FIFA. A man concerned with only two things in life, money and wrecking the English game. It is his love of money which led to this debacle. Never before have qualifying play-offs been seeded, but suddenly with France and Portugal, packed with big money making names such as Henry and Ronaldo, due to be in the play-offs Moron B changed the system. He couldn't possibly sit idly by as one money maker knocked out another. In came the seedings and through went both Portugal and France. One of his officials may have been wrong and the use of video refs called into question again but Moron B won't care, he just made some more money.

I feel for the Irish I really do, I also feel for the referee. It may have been an awful decision but it was not one he made on purpose, he will now always be the referee who allowed that goal and I hope for his and his family's sake he continues to be an international ref and doesn't get any death threats that have come the way of other controversial refs. For Blatter and Platini the means does not matter, it is all about the result. The same could be said of Henry, I hope it plays on his and the French's conscience and they perform the way they should in the World Cup. Most of all I hope that all this doesn't take a shine off the World Cup. For now it will cloud all our excitement, hopefully come 4th December it will all be forgotten!