Nobody's Climbing Through This Window

BANG! Window shut my friends! And what a dramatic day it was, David James didn't go anywhere. Nicky Shorey didn't go anywhere. David Bentley didn't go anywhere. Frank Ribery didn't go anywhere. Martin Petrov didn't go anywhere. Mathew Upson didn't go anywhere. OK you get the picture, it wasn't very exciting at all, in fact one of the most exciting pieces of news was that Patrick Viera had 3 days off from Inter Milan and took a trip to London, but club wise, he didn't go anywhere.

So despite many a phone calls, and lots of dramatic music, by the boys, and ladies, at Sky Sports News, the end of that busiest of days that is transfer window day, finished with a whimper and no sight of a Robinho or Berbatovesque deal that we were treated to last season. We just spent the day praying for some Middle Eastern take over of say for example Burnley. Obviously with the window closing at 5 p.m we lost 7 hours of last minute transfers, although judging by today it's a good thing.

Anyway you're probably wondering when I'm going to get round to talking about each clubs transfers, well I'm not so ha! Instead I've put together my squad of transfers; the good, the bad, the downright odd. I've got my starting 11 and my subs.... So here goes; (team from right to left)

Joe Hart; Goalkeepers were hard to come by, and this is the reason you'll notice there isn't a goalkeeper on my subs bench. Hart has moved to Birmingham on loan to get first team football, and who can blame him. The superstars of Manchester City have Shay Given in between the sticks and sitting on the bench won't help the youngsters chances of making the World Cup squad.

Glen Johnson; This man's transfer cannot go unnoted. Finally allowed to make a real impact at a big 4 club several years after he was one of the first players involved in the Abramovich transfers. And at the beginning of what will be a long season Johnson already looks every bit the England player he has become. £17 million might seem a lot for a right back but come the end of the season his early impact may make a huge difference to Liverpool's season

Sol Campbell; At 34 the ex Spurs and Arsenal play would not have been the oldest football in top flight football by a long way. And as good old Harry said if he had been at any club other than Spurs he would have signed the ex England man. So if Harry would have, and as we're led to believe, many other Premiership managers wanted to sign Campbell, why did he end up at League 2 Notts County. Obviously because of Sven Goran Eriksson and his new role as Director of Football there but still this is a loony transfer for a man with 73 England caps and who would surely on an off chance still be looking to add to them.

Robert Huth; Down with Middelsborough last season and snapped back up to the Preniership with Stoke in August. Another ex Chelsea defender and one who, along with Sanil Tuncay's transfer from and to the same club as Huth, really showed the ambition that Tony Pulis and his Stoke side have. Not only in climbing the table but looking to add style with Tuncay, Pulis is looking up and only up, teams as high up as West Ham better look out the Potters are coming!

Joleon Lescott; The third most expensive defender ever? Yes that's right, Alessandro Nesta, Rio Ferdinand, Joleon Lescott- the quality gets lower as you go down that list I know but at £22 million pounds the ex Everton man's fee was ridiculous. Applause to David Moyes for wanting to hold onto him and for finally letting him go for enough money to rebuild his defence. And laughter to Mark Hughes for suggesting Lescott is the best defender in Britain- why the £40 million approach for John Terry I wonder.

Cristiano Ronaldo; What to say about this man. Will United miss him? Yes! Already shown it in the loss to Burnley. Now offence to Burnley but Ronaldo would have found something, someway to unlock the Burnley defence. Never mind the fact that Michael Carrick missed a penalty, United's former number 7 would not. Maybe it's not the selling of Ronaldo that has truly effected the United side maybe it's the true lack of a replacement.

Xabi Alonso; If Glen Johnson has added a lot of creativity to the Liverpool flank then the sale of Xabi Alonso to that small Spanish side in Madrid has taken almost all of their central creativity away. Sounds ridiculous with a team with Stevie G and Mr Torres but Gerrard drives the team forward rather than sprays the ball around from deep and 'El Nino' only creates in the final third. Alonso's replacement is untested in English football and currently still injured. Alberto Aquilani your new city needs you.

Fabian Delph; Stand up! Take your rapturous applause! Why? Because this man agreed to go to Aston Villa, and when Manchester City came to no doubt give him more money he still signed for Aston Villa. His old club Leeds United should also take a bow for doing the same. OK I know, me talking about City's money is getting boring. But I simply mean it's nice to see a youngster with some professionalism. More to the point young Mr Delph is English and may have ended up ruined at City. This happened back at Chelsea with Scott Parker, Shaun Wright-Phillips and Glen Johnson to name but three.

Damien Duff; Another player who went down with a North East side last season. Straight into the Europa League with Fulham. Duff has played for many years in the Premier League for clubs with differing fortunes, from a struggling Newcastle to a title winning Chelsea and a European battling/relegation fighting Blackburn side. Fulham will be better for his experience and silky smooth skill and Duff will be better for not being in the Championship.

Emmanuel Adebayor; Partially so City fans stop shouting at me for being anti-City but mainly because, as we've already seen, a happy Adebayor in the right surroundings is a goal scoring machine. Don't be surprised to see this man's name above the top of the top goal scorers chart, even with the African nations coming up. Furthermore his previous club, Arsenal, may end up missing him and end up outside the top 4, although on current form that's not likely.

Darren Bent; Last time young Darren moved clubs he was more expensive that Thierry Henry, this time round he's not caused such a stir which may well just suit him. Not only that but Bent will now be getting games on a regular basis, something not true at Spurs, and last time he got games was at Charlton where funnily enough he also got goals. Time for an England call?

Substitutes

Sebastien Bassong; When your main defender is injury prone to the highest degree it's a problem. When your top 3 central defenders are injury prone and out the first games of the season you've got a massive problem- enter Bassong!

John Terry; OK so he never went. But as one of the longest running transfer saga's I think he deserves a place on the bench. The England captain might also want to make a call to Mr Hughes to thank him for his new £8 million-a-year contract.

Teemu Tainio; Not a world beater but a steady midfielder. Tainio's inclusion doesn't come from the club he joined on loan Birmingham, but more that by leaving Sunderland temporarily, the club only have 6 recognised midfielders which could be a problem.

Stephen Hunt; Another season in the Championship would have been unfair on the Irish winger although he will need to play well to stop his new side, Hull, from relegation this season. Already a goalscorer this man can be dangerous.

Niko Kranjcar; Harry magic on the last day of the window. We may have been expecting more, like Martin Petrov, but this Croation midfield dynamo will have to do for Spurs but will be instrumental with Modric out for two months.

Michael Owen; It's still a little hard to believe the ex Liverpool man is at Manchester United. Had a slow start but so have the whole of his new team, when the Champions get into third gear and above the goals will come for Owen no doubt, but will Capello notice?

Jozy Altidore; Must be a nice feeling when you're the managers first choice signing, don't ask Jozy though. After Phil Brown was turned down by Michael Owen, Marc Antoine Fortune, Fraizer Campbell, Daryl Murphy and no doubt some others I've forgotten, he turned to the American youngster, those rejections could turn out to be the best piece of business for Phil.

Now for the exciting news! Sporting 1-5 South Manchester. We lost first up but we'll bounce back no doubt. It would sound like a mauling in real football but this is Sunday league and it was quite a tame score. The height advantage to them was a real factor as most of our goals were conceded at set pieces, fortunately we have some of our bigger players to come back so no need to worry just yet.

One final word this week, and it comes a week late maybe. Last week, in those scenes of utter hideousness at Upton Park as, and I refuse to call them football fans, the morons who follow West Ham United and Millwall ran onto the pitch, and attacked each other and the police outside the pitch causing havoc, one young man stood playing football like normal. But it wasn't like normal at all, Jack Collison played with more bravery than most of us could imagine to pluck up in the most serene of circumstances never mind in the cauldron of hate in that stadium that night. Sometimes in life football is insignificant but we can only tell by actually playing!

It's Football Gav, But Not As We Know It!

This weekend's biggest match will be huge and as is often the case it comes from Manchester. No you silly people, nothing to do with Manchester United vs Arsenal- it's all about a match that will take place on Sunday morning, not far from Old Trafford actually.

Yes ladies and gents, it's time for the MJSL to kick off its season. There in the picture is where it will all take place, underneath the lovely skyline of Beetham tower is the hallowed turf of Frederick Road, Salford. Beautiful isn't it. Actually I've been slightly lying to you, the picture shows pitch 3 and the most important match will be on pitch 2!

The team I've been telling you all about for months finally get their first taste of football since April. First up is a friendly on Wednesday. Sporting JLGB (that's us) take on Crumpsall. This is an annual friendly that Sporting usually win only to lose during the season to Crumpsall. I suppose I should fill any of those who don't know in on the details.

Only a few years ago Crumpsall FC were the worst team in the league, maybe second ahead of the 16 year olds in Maccabi 6th. They played bad football and had bad players. But suddenly they became good, much adulation goes to Zevi Saunders, their manager. Crumpsall's style of play isn't always pretty but it is effective (I realise Sunday league football isn't usually pretty but still). Now with better players and an effective way of playing Crumpsall have become a very dangerous side, reached several finals and picked up silverware. Unfortunately for the team, they have lost several players from last season and will line up on Wednesday with an almost unknown starting 11. No matter the outcome the rematch comes just over a week later. To be precise it's Crumpsall vs Sporting JLGB in the league 8 days after the friendly, don't be surprised to hear two completely different results.

After the friendly and before the league game against Crumpsall, Sporting start their league season against South Manchester Maccabi. Once again Freddy Road hosts this one with Sporting hoping to kick off their season in style. South Manchester are a slight unknown quantity. A team who change quite a few players every season, firstly some of their players will be off to university around the country and secondly rumours abound that they have picked up several ex Crumpsall players, though this could be true of several teams in the MJSL, just not Sporting. Our matches against South Manchester are often eventful, although to be honest there isn't often an uneventful match with us. Last season though we only manager to play one match against them as the second match was cancelled because they couldn't get enough players together, that's how scary an opposition we are.

Now I guess I should tell you about us a little bit more. Sporting JLGB are about fun and winning, although the winning is sometimes harder to come by. Led by our manager Gavin Sharpe the boys enjoy nothing more than getting out onto the pitch on a Sunday morning and giving it their all, often in a vain attempt to win. On paper we're a much better side but we let ourselves down with the odd implosive performance, argument on the pitch- comes with all being friends, and our general fitness is generally awful! Having said that we also play some really attractive football, as far as Sunday League goes anyway. As mentioned some weeks ago this season we have a kit sponsor and this will help us survive, so thank you to CliveAnthony Residential Lettings (http://www.cliveanthony.co.uk/) (01617961000). I know it's a shameless link but I don't care. The guys there are really nice and care a lot about the project at Sporting JLGB, they don't imagine for one minute that we'll generate millions for them by being on the front of our shirts but they care about us and that's what matters.

The MJSL is where we ply our trade. It's of course not the most glamorous league in the world, it's not even the most glamorous Sunday league in Manchester but we love it. The MJSL houses just 11 teams but it's a fun league to play in and it cares about its teams. We only hope this season we can win some silverware and end the team's run of forever.

Normally I like to do a comparison between the Premiership, or whatever I've written about, to our Sunday League side, and this week I'd like to do the opposite, but I think this would take away from the message I'd like to convey. There is no comparison, for the boys who play this is of course the closest we'll ever get to the Premiership, a referee, an official competition. But as much as it is the closest, it is also, fortunately, nothing like real football. Down in the MJSL, at Frederick Road playing fields, not many people care what's going on, and in a weird way we're quite happy about that because we care, we know the magic that takes place. So here's to Sporting JLGB and a wonderful season ahead.... SPORTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!!!!!!!!!!

Going to the World Cup? I think he Defoe should be!

Un-fancied newly promoted side beat Champions, failing Arsenal batter Everton, ball nestles in the bottom corner of the net but the goals not given, a team winning 7-1 lose their manager to the side they beat, forgotten England man scores twice against Holland and then a hat-trick against Hull, Birmingham and Portsmouth nearly under new ownership, cracking goals from Rodallega and Assou-Ekotto to name but two, a League Cup draw that sees West Ham play Millwall in the next round- My how I wish the football season would get exciting sometime soon, there's just nothing going on at the moment!

The list above provides many talking points that I could dig into- Who United need? Why Arsenal still need to buy or Why Everton should sell Lescott? Is goal-line technology needed? Why would you move to Norwich? Can any one save Portsmouth? Will anyone survive Milwall vs West Ham! But it is the man who has scored 5 times in 3 games so far this season that intrigues me most. Enter Jermaine!

Some weeks ago now I blogged about the England team and it's need for a hero, one willing to put his body on the line, it was slightly tongue in cheek, I would never hope to have an England hero only on the basis that he's almost constantly injured. But the point remains the same if the 'Golden Generation' are to grab the FIFA World Cup Trophy at their last attempt then they really will need some inspiration from somewhere.

There is obvious choices amongst the pack, I don't need to introduce you to Messers Rooney, Gerrard, Lampard, Beckham, Terry, Cole (Joe or Ashley). In fact many of the starting line up already have their place. But now the World Cup is well and truly a squad competition, 11 Lions and 11 kittens will just not do, Mr Capello will be wise to avoid the next Walcott fiasco, sorry Mr Wilshere maybe in 2014.

Before the season started the search for the other 11 lions began in earnest. Of course those all but on the flight wanted to give the newbies something to do, so they purposely went 2-0 down against Netherlands and let Defoe, Cole, Wright-Phillips, Carrick and Milner really work for their seats. And they did! Milner is a player who has done a lot at international level long before making his full debut, after all the man has more U21 caps than any other England player ever. He is also a man whose best position is probably wide right, it's a good job for him England don't have Walcott, Beckham, Wright-Phillips, Lennon who can all play there...oh wait! But in all seriousness Milner is a player who could and should find his way to South Africa as a man who can play anywhere across the midfield and even upfront. Player's with versatility, especially those with the ability to go upfront, are key, especially when you remember the lack of options in that position 3 years ago.

Other than a goalkeeper, it is the striking department that is England's main worry. After Rooney you would find it difficult to find a definate choice to go to Bafana Bafana. We know that Capello likes a tall man for Rooney to play off, and he likes Heskey to be that man, but even the ex Liverpool player is only pencilled in. Heskey's main opposition will come from the ever growing (in stature rather than height) Carlton Cole. Finally Cole is showing the promise that he had all those years ago at Stamford Bridge and if his form for West Ham continues from the back end of last season he may well find himself in the starting line up for the World Cup. Another man looming large though is Darren Bent, just signed for Sunderland, the ex Spurs striker will flourish with regular first team football and could just overtake Crouch and Heskey in England's pecking order, he may have to wait for an injury to get himself in the squad in one of the matches before the squad announcement though.

The position of 'Not Rooney' is perhaps even more interesting. This is of course the man who can come off the bench when Rooney is not playing well or is producing too much red mist, or who perhaps will start if England's talisman is injured. I'll give you the contenders- Gabriel Agbonlahor, Michael Owen, Jermain Defoe, Theo Walcott, Ashley Young. Those are the main one's, and it's slightly depressing reading- don't get me wrong all very talented but not a great list, and here's why. Agbonlahor has done very little, other than looked impressive at times his figures aren't great. We know Capello does not like Owen, this may change during his time with United and you can never count out Owen, but you can't count on him either. Young and Walcott will possibly already be at the World Cup as wingers and of course as I mentioned earlier, the ability to play in many positions is very useful. And so we're left with Defoe- amazingly talented, and a man who will score goals, it is now up to the the ex West Ham striker to play well for Spurs and keep Capello thinking about him. How he wasn't taken to the World Cup three years ago is ridiculous, this time round though, he may end up being the explosive weapon England so desperately need.

And so, 10 months early, here's the England squad of 23 I'd like to see on that plane!

Foster, James, Green

Ferdinand, Terry, Ashley Cole, Johnson, Bridge, Lescott, Upson

Gerrard, Lampard, Barry, Milner, Ashley Young, Walcott, Hargreaves, Carrick

Rooney, Carlton Cole, Bent, Defoe, Owen

If Mr Hargraves would like to get fit and stay fit and Mr Capello would like to read my blog then maybe I'll get my squad... Of course you lot won't agree, so let me know who you'd take!

England Expects That Every Man Will Do His Duty

They will call it the 3rd test. They will be wrong! They will say that with KP out England have less chance of winning the ashes. They will be wrong!

The truth is that it is the 78th test. Or more importantly his 78th test, and then will come the 79th and finally the 80th and after that it will be over. That man of course sits, arms in the air, to the right of this paragraph, that man is Andrew "Freddie" Flintoff.

I know! Most of you care not about cricket but about football. But for those of you who don't know the man from Preston is about to retire from Test Cricket. He will no doubt be remembered as a great cricketer, as a great personality but one who never took as many wickets or scored as many runs as he probably should have. Freddie may still deliver a World Cup trophy for his nation, but if he does not then he will have led England to victory in at least one, and hopefully two, ashes series victories. Yes partially this will be through his talent, but mainly it will be through his will, through his destiny!

OK stop looking at me all funny! I've not suddenly developed a massive weird streak, well weirder any way. But does it not seem odd, in the case of Freddie and in the case of another English sportsman, that somewhere it must be written "You will capture the hearts of the nation and bring to them glory, but you will sacrifice your body and soul and injuries shall stop you from winning more.". Bit precise I know. And at this point you must be thinking the other sportsman must be a footballer, after all I couldn't have spoken this long without mentioning football. You're wrong, the other man is Jonny Wilkinson.

England's World Cup winning Fly-Half put in hours, days, weeks and months of extra training to learn how to kick the perfect kick in rugby. And so after sacrificing body and mind and, at times, getting England to the World Cup final almost single handed (or with his left boot), Wilko injured his shoulder in the final. He went onto kick that kick and so the celebrations began. The number 10 from Newcastle had brought World Cup success to England for the first time in a major sport since 1966 but the shoulder he injured would start the chain reaction that would see him barely play, not just for England, for a long time. Jonny is still playing, but no doubt he will get injured to the extent that will lead to retirement.

And what's the point of me yabbering on about these two men? One who plays with smaller and one with a more odd shape ball, than this column usually focuses on. Well my point is, these two men have put everything, and more, on the line. For what? For their country and their sport. And again the point to all this? The fact that England's football team do not have this man.

Rooney, Owen, Beckham- all these man have tried, with their will, to win England a World Cup, and all of these men have had injuries along the way. But none of these men have really made the sacrifices necessary. For one Owen and Rooney both play for the World Club champions and Beckham only threw away his chance of playing for one of Europe's best teams permanently and not on loan once Steve Mclaren had told him his chances of playing for England were over. No where is there a man willing to end his career prematurely in order to bring us the joy of being World Champions, one day, we may do it, we may even do it soon, without someone having to lose a leg or other limb. In this generation we may have to accept that we will see a rugby world cup, we will see 2 ashes wins (here's hoping) we just probably won't get the football world cup we

hope for.

Meanwhile, in the world of Sunday league football, all is well! We have a sponsor! This doesn't sound like ground breaking news I know, but it means that we get to stay a float. At the top level of football player's are getting paid more and more whilst at the bottom rung football gets more expensive. We find it difficult to find places to train, a five-a-side match costs £56 for an hour, our pitch for the season will cost £75 more than last season, all this in a recession. I must thank our sponsor Clive Anthony residential lettings for their commitment to our team.

Rising costs and falling numbers in males playing 11-a-side football in our country, it's perhaps no surprise that there isn't enough English players coming through to play in the Premiership and trying to force their way into the England football team. And with the nature of football- International stop club football, which is unlike the other two sports- perhaps it is impossible that one man will have to give up everything to win us a world cup. But England should at least produce one man who WOULD, given the opportunity, give it all up for that beautiful trophy. England Expects! Now we just have to wait!

Fantasy Football? More Stupidity that Fantasy

As the story goes Roman Abramovich flew over Stamford Bridge and decided to buy Chelsea instead of Spurs. It was great timing for Chelsea, they had just beaten Liverpool on the last day of the season to steal the last Champions League place, it apparently saved Chelsea from administration. In a manner of weeks they went from near administration to being cash rich beyond belief. The Russian bought to football his billions and set about taking Chelsea from battling for 4th place to battling for titles home and abroad.

His billions have of course brought success to Chelsea by bringing in some of the world's best players. But without doubt Chelsea's money has at times meant over buying, or certainly buying the wrong players. In fact one of the first players bought to 'The Bridge' under the Russians reign was Juan Sebastien Veron, once touted as one of the world's best players, the Argentinian had found British football difficult to contend with after his £30 million move to Manchester United. Two years later and United had recouped half their money by shipping him off to Chelsea.

5 years later, and from almost nowhere, Sheikh Mansour Bin Zayed Al Nahyan (I looked it up on Wikipedia) bought Manchester City. The news shocked the footballing world. Mansour is very rich, rich beyond Abramovich. In he came and we were promised big money and big signings. On the last day of the transfer window in August 2008, as the world expected Manchester United to sign Dimitar Berbatov, City proved they meant business. News circulated that the Blues had put in a bid for the Bulgarian and that Berbatov was on his way to Manchester to have talks with City. As a United fan who never really wanted Berbatov at Old Trafford I suddenly panicked "We need to sign him" was suddenly my view. Meanwhile in London Chelsea were expected to finally wrap up the signing of Robinho, the Brazilian from Real Madrid. Chelsea were so certain of his transfer they had even accidentally had Chelsea shirts with Robinho's name on the back on sale from their website. I've no idea if any of those shirts ever got sold, if they were I'd love to get my hands on one. City had pulled the greatest trick ever. Whilst people laughed, and I'm sure Chelsea fans were amongst those laughing, at City stealing United's primary transfer target, City moved instead for a British record... £32 million for Robinho!

Nearly one year later and after a not so great season City were ready to spend their millions all over again. Everyone had been linked, from Adebayour to Andy Bishop (Bury FC's top goalscorer, ok they weren't quite linked to him but still). The two names who kept cropping up were Blackburn's Roque Santa Cruz, Mark Hughes's former talisman, and United's very own crowd pleasing Argentinian, Carlos Tevez. With Tevez seemingly at loggerheads with Sir Alex and the United hierarchy a move to City looked inevitable, and alas, it was done. £25 million and a wage no doubt near £125,000 a week took Tevez to City. Santa Cruz had already signed- £18 million and a wage probably similar to that of Tevez was enough to take the ex Bayern Munich striker to City. And finally this week Emmanuel Adebayor was signed from soon to be rivals Arsenal for £25 million and a wage of reportedly £140,000 a week. Wages not included City have spent around £67 million on 3 strikers, meaning they have 9 strikers to chose from. Right so we can see City mean business, and they have the money to back up their claims.

Down in London, Chelsea have not spend the millions and millions that they did in the early years of the Chealski era, they simply can't. Firstly Abromovich has to write off the money he's lost from pay offs for his previous managers- Jose Mourinho, Avram Grant and Luiz Felipe Scolari. Then there's money from the signings of flops like Andriy Shevchenko. And finally following the global recession we know Abramovich lost lots of money, up to £10 billion has been quoted. So Chelsea went after a cheap option as a striker. Chelsea have signed young Daniel Sturridge. A player who Manchester City have let go, the reason being they refused to give the 19 year old from their own youth system a £70,000 a week contract. Chelsea will have to hand over a maximum of £10 million for the youngster, though this fee could be signficantly less depending what the tribunal for his transfer fee decide. Whilst City have made it abundantly clear they will stop at nothing and spend anything to get to the silverwear and the promised land of the Champions League they have also continued to claim they will look after their youth system and continue bringing through youngsters. Youth players such as Daniel Sturridge. Now don't get me wrong £70,000 a week for a 19 year old is pretty hefty, but when you already have 8 strikers, including Santa Cruz, Tevez and Robinho, why not spend £70,000 a week for Sturridge and save yourself the extra £70,000 a week and £25 million transfer fee for Adebayour, it's madness. For one we know that FIFA would love nothing more than to enforce the 5 foreigner rule on the Premiership, good move City! Sturridge will hopefully go on to be an England player, under the coaching of Carlos Ancelotti and with help from fellow strikers Nicolas Anelka and Didier Drogba he may become one of the world's best. City will do great, but one day the money may dry up, and they'll look around for their youth prospects, funnily enough they may find it difficult to find them.

On a sad note, I for one, and I hope you my readers will join me in wishing John Hartson all the best in recovering from his terrible illness. Football is important to us all, it is a passion, a religion to some. But in life there is always something more important and in this case it is life itself. All the best John, get better!

I will leave you on something slightly lighter. As all football team's begin training for the new season the Sunday league's are no different. I wonder if Sir Alex, Carlos and Rafa have the same problems as us? Player's unfit because of drinking and general unfitness, players on holiday, taking a youth group on tour to Israel. On one hand our team does have someone away playing in the Jewish Olympics, I guess there's one link to professional football!

It's a Whole New Ball Game

The great return of a true legend is here.... Can you believe that "Sidler on Football" has been gone for so long. But fear not it is back.

Talking of being back, I had just arrived in the hotel room in Brussels when my fellow traveller announced "I think United have signed Owen!", not sure whether to believe him or not I text my dad immediately and then tried to catch a glimmer of information on Sky News in between breaks in the Roddick vs Murray Semi-final. And behold I eventually caught sight of the sports news midway through the 2nd set, and Owen was indeed having a medical at Old Trafford. "No don't worry" I jested to the third of our travelling party "Owen's not signing for United, he's having his medical". Several hours later and Michael Owen had signed for Manchester United, oh to see the look on Liverpool fan's faces.


For true neutrals and United fans you can't help but feel pretty happy for Owen. A man who has constantly given his all for his country and who constantly tries to pick himself up from injuries that would have burried lesser men is back where he belongs, not in the Championship with the laughing stock of Newcastle United but with the Premier league champions, not that he's ever been at a club to hold that title before.



No doubt though the arrival of the man from Chester was a shock and with their Manchester rivals seemingly using money as toilet paper it surely leaves cynics questioning United's ability to spend big money for big players. Enter Antonio Valencia and Gabriel Obertan, in the scheme of things not exactly the world's best known or most talented players. Of course the Red Devils have also lost arguably two world class players in the hard working fan's favourite, Carlos Tevez, and of course the world's most expensive football player, Cristiano Ronaldo. Suddenly United's team has lost 2 world class players worth up to 50 goals a season and gained one 'washed up' striker, an exciting winger who helped Wigan to the brink of Europe and an almost unkown young French winger, in total last season scoring a grand total of 14 goals between them in league matches. Is it possible that Sir Alex would willingly throw away that many goals from his team?



Of course it has to be noted that United are still continually linked with strikers such as Huntelaar, Fabiano and Aguero, and with still almost all of the £80 million from Ronaldo's transfer who could count out more signings coming in. But would United really spend the £20 odd million for either of the first two or the £40 million for Maradonna's son-in-law when they already have Rooney, Berbatov and Owen, along with their promising youngsters, Macheda and Wellbeck? That money would certainly be better used for a hard tackling central midfielder, with Hargreaves future uncertain, we've heard rumours from everything between him being ready to come back now to him having to retire, the Reds are short on true grit in the centre of the park, no matter how good Carrick, Anderson, Fletcher and co are.



But back to my holiday, and no I'm not going to suggest I have a comparisson with my holiday and what United need to do next season. I am though a holiday reader and figure myself a student of sport, not only in the literal sense but also by reading about many sports. Over a year ago I was reading Ed Smith's "What Sport Tells Us About Life", a great book on it's own, in it Smith talks lots about "Moneyball", a book about Baseball. Now I have no great knowledge of baseball but quite enjoy watching it so decided that Moneyball would be a good book to further my knowledge of the sport and its culture. I read some of Moneyball before departing for my holiday but whilst on holiday I read the majority of it and more to the point the juicy bits.

Moneyball tells the story of a team with very little money taking on the teams with lots and almost winning. Ok ok, stop shouting, I know this is nothing to do with United. But it's more in the science of it all that interests me. Billy Beane, the manager of the team involved in Moneyball, loses his main players on what are free transfers because they can't afford there wages once big teams come after them, and replaces them with not a like for like replacement but with several players who make up the different parts of the one he has just lost, in short- "the sum of all parts is greater than the whole". Ronaldo's goals will never be replicated by one player, and certainly not one winger but United can replicate his goals as a team. Returning to a 4-4-2 will allow Berbatov and specifically Rooney to score more goals, add in Owen's goals and more from a midfield which has often been too busy covering Ronaldo to score and you are someway towards Ronaldo's goals. Add in Valencia and Obertan's ability to run with the ball and cross and your creating more team chances than Ronaldo ever did.



One last word on Owen. I for one can't wait till the day Owen comes on as a substitute for United at Anfield. The boo's will ring out! Owen inside will smile and say to himself "they hate me, they really hate me". Owen loved Liverpool, they made him the striker he was and got him into the England squad. Liverpool, or more to the point Rafa Benitez, sold him, got rid of him! Then they didn't want him back, both on his return from Madrid and in his horrible time at Newcatle. Finally with Newcastle relegated and a Liverpool hero falling into the Championship Rafa didn't want to know, he made no approach. And so the world's best team did, and Owen signed. Liverpool fan's will talk of loyalty, of playing for the enemy, maybe Liverpool should look at the enemy within.



Meanwhile Sir Alex will continue with his scientific approach to football, replace the parts not the sum, continue winning and continue pulling the rabbit out of the hat. Elsewhere in Madrid, Ronaldo will be happy, £80 million pounds were payed for him, he'll like that, people will adore him and think of him as the saviour, he'll love that! United will replace him with a bunch of players no where near as good as him, he'll be a little baffled but he knows Sir Alex well enough to not be surprised. Batter Up!

Oh for a little escapism!

Firstly I’d like to apologise to you my avid followers for taking so long for my latest post, I was planning on writing something about the comparison between a money mad Gareth Barry and a success mad Kaka, based on the latter’s turning down Manchester City back in January to go to Real Madrid for less money in July. There are problems here of course, firstly Kaka is hardly on the minimum wage, secondly who am I to criticise Gareth Barry, I mean who wouldn’t want 110k a week, and finally if the papers are to be true Kaka asked Madrid for in the region of ten million pounds for his dad and one million for his brother, greed apparently is good after all.

Right so that’s that done with now to the world of escapism! Many people in the world, not me obviously I have time to write this blog, have busy, hectic, demanding lives including jobs, children to look after, parents to look after. Of course many use sport as their way to escape. After all what’s better after a stressful week’s work than to sit in your favourite seat at your football team’s ground and watch them play frustratingly poor and nearly give you a heart-attack with woeful defending. But for one man sport and specifically football could be the answer to all his troubles!

With his world tumbling around him this country’s ‘top’ man could turn to football. Of course I’m talking about the hapless Gordon Brown! With good old ‘Gordo’ changing his cabinet members more often that students change underwear at the moment I’ve come up with some footballing suggestions for the next time Mr Brown decides to shuffle his ministers about a bit.

I’ll dive straight in with our PM’s old position of Chancellor of the Exchequer, and my choice is another Scot. The man who took Everton to the FA cup final this year, none other than David Moyes. In this day and age of economic frailties who else but a man who’s done a lot from very little. Signing Tim Cahill, one of the Premiership’s most dangerous midfielders, for only £1.5 million is pretty astute, £2 million on England international Joleon Lescott. I could go on for a while. The fact is that with so little money having to go so far only Moyes could be a choice, after all Britain would happily be the 5th best country in the world right now.

I know you’re wondering who’s going to be Secretary of State for Energy and Climate change. Well it’s none other than Manchester City’s Robinho. Ok, so not the greatest of seasons for the small Brazilian but he still ended the season as 4th top goal scorer in the league after moving from the sun of Madrid to the rain of Manchester. And no one can question the ex-Santos man’s bountiful energy. Plus there’s the added fact he got the bus to the Trafford Centre when going shopping with his wife.

Next up, and you’ll notice there’s no logical order for these, is Secretary of State for Defence, now this is more difficult than the previous two, I mean we could pick good old Joey Barton, no one would start with us then, but I’m thinking Secretary of State for Justice for this magpie, after all which footballer knows the justice system better! So back to defence, we could go with the big Serb Nemanja Vidic but seeing as the best form of defence is attack we’ll have to go a different way. And with that thought in mind I’m going with Rory Delap, our air missiles will be the best in the world without doubt.

Gareth Barry certainly won’t be the Secretary of State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs, after all Manchester might be in Europe but no one from the mainland will be visiting Eastlands any time soon. No this spot would have to go to the master of all things foreign, Arsene Wenger. I considered Secretary of State for Health going to Michael Owen, in the same way as his Newcastle colleague Mr Barton is a justice system expert, Owen is definitely an expert on the health system.

Finally the PM himself, well I don’t think Mr Brown should continue so we need a footballing replacement. I considered going outside of football and going with Ross Brawn but that wouldn’t be very Sidleresque. Sir Alex is always an option, but then he’s not an expert at making failing things work, or at least not since the early 1990s. Down the road at Anfield things are hardly running smoothly, but after too much pressure Rafa would end up ranting at the leader of the opposition, FACT! Like Mike Ashley, and this is the first and last time I’ll ever compare myself to him, I’m not convinced Alan Shearer will get Newcastle promoted or this country in the right shape. There can only really be one man, and whilst his team could lose to Andorra and make me look very stupid, our next PM has to be David Beckham..... Ok so I’m joking. If we can have an Italian run our football team then why not have Fabio Capello run our country. I know this week it’s not linked to Sunday league football, but trust me, everyone in our team could run this brilliant nation better than it’s being run at the moment. Unfortunately Mr Brown won’t step down, but we can always dream of a world run by football!